The Ridiculous Reason My OBGYN Told Me To Get Pregnant When I Was 17

I started having severe stomach symptoms when I was 13. After seeing, well, I don’t know how many doctors, having I don’t know how many tests, being told I was anorexic, being told I was gluten intolerant (this was WAY before being gluten intolerant was a thing), being told I probably have cancer, mistakenly getting my gall bladder removed at 15, and having exploratory diagnostic surgery, I was finally diagnosed with Stage IV Endometriosis when I was 17.

I was ecstatic to finally know what was wrong with me. I couldn’t wait for my next doctor’s appointment where I would learn the treatment that would cure me and finally rid me of my constant pain.

My hopes and dreams were instantly crushed when I was sitting in the doctor’s office for the first time after my diagnosis and learned of my treatment recommendation.

The doctor told me my best option was to get pregnant. There was no cure for endometriosis regardless of what stage. The only other treatment option to manage my symptoms, which was less effective, was to have more excision surgery and take birth control. Eventually, I would likely need a full hysterectomy.

Sitting on that cold table in a nearly dark office, I quietly wondered how getting pregnant could be the best treatment option my doctor could come up with? Especially, for a 17-year-old? I had just finished my junior year of high school. I was about to be a senior. I was applying for college. Not surprisingly, having a baby didn’t really fit into my plans.

At the time, I didn’t know how to advocate for myself. I didn’t know that there may be other, more holistic options. I didn’t know you could just get a second opinion. Or a third. Or a fourth.

What did I want to say to that doctor so badly? ARE YOU F****** KIDDING ME? The best you can come up with is to tell a teenager in high school to get pregnant?

Fast forward another eight years or so. Once again I found myself sitting on a cold table, in a dark office. Even though it was a different doctor, it all felt the same. I had just had my fourth excision surgery and I was at my post-op appointment eagerly waiting to discuss my outlook and treatment options with my doctor. Eight years had passed and surely there had to be better options for me by now.

The first thing the doctor said to me when he walked in the room was, “Well you sure have a mess in there but the silver lining is there is nothing blocking your fallopian tubes.”

I wondered to myself what that even meant. What did my fallopian tubes have to do with anything?

My doctor told me my best option was to go on a medicine that would put me into menopause — Lupron. Since I had been on it before, I was well aware of the laundry list of side effects that went along with it — headaches, weight gain, hot flashes, depression, anxiety, irritability, changes in my vision, and fatigue just to name a few.

My doctor listed other options — most of which I had tried before and had negative experiences and received little benefit.

Appearing frustrated at my lack of enthusiasm towards any of the recommended treatment options, in a somewhat exasperated manner my doctor told me to just get pregnant. I shouldn’t have any endo symptoms during the pregnancy and I would likely feel better for at least a year postpartum. It finally made sense why my fallopian tubes were the silver lining for my doctor.

I was annoyed once again a doctor was telling me to just get pregnant instead of coming up with real treatment options that didn’t have more side effects than the actual disease I had been battling for so many years.

I explained to my doctor that I was single with ZERO prospects so getting pregnant wasn’t really an option. My doctor responded with, “You just need a SPERM DONOR, not a husband. I think some time on Tinder would get the job done!”

Realizing the conversation was going nowhere, I just laughed off the comment and reluctantly agreed to try Lupron again.

Once again, I wasn’t able to be my own advocate. I left the appointment agreeing to a treatment option that I knew I didn’t want to do. I was in utter disbelief that after all this time, getting pregnant, having excision surgery, and/or taking birth control with awful side effects was the best the medical community could come up with.

Why aren’t we making any progress with this disease? Endometriosis affects millions of women, yet the treatment offered to me today is the same treatment my mom was offered in 1982.

Part of the problem is the stigma surrounding women’s reproductive health. Another part of the problem is a lack of funding and research. Another part of the problem is that current treatment options only focus on treating the actual lesions and do not take overall quality of life into consideration.

Telling a woman at any age to just get pregnant should not be one of the three go-to treatment options. This is wrong and unfair for so many reasons, especially when you take into consideration that infertility can be a complication of endometriosis.

It felt cruel that my doctor would recommend pregnancy when I had heard so many horror stories of women with endometriosis struggling to get pregnant and many not being able to conceive at all. It felt ridiculous that I was supposed to go through this major life-changing event that would impact me for the rest of my life just to feel better for maybe two years.

After being on the Lupron for a couple of months and experiencing unbearable side effects, I decided to quit everything. I quit the Lupron. I quit birth control. I quit doctors. I decided to treat my endometriosis holistically which mostly consisted of eating an anti-inflammatory diet.

Four years later, when my husband and I were ready to start a family, I was fortunate and able to conceive quite easily. I was relieved that I experienced nearly zero endo symptoms during the pregnancy. Life was good.

Within three months of delivering my son, my endo symptoms were back with a vengeance. I thought my symptoms had been bad before, but I had no idea. My flow was so heavy I was becoming anemic. The pain would keep me on the couch for days at a time. I started getting migraines. I even began experiencing pain when I was ovulating that lasted until my period started.

At first, I wondered if it was just me but when I asked others who also suffer from endometriosis it appeared to be very common for women to experience worse symptoms postpartum. Some women even suffered from endo symptoms during the pregnancy. So not only does pregnancy not reduce your symptoms for a year or so postpartum like my doctor said, for many, it actually makes the symptoms significantly worse.

Bottom line, if you are suffering from Endometriosis do not under any circumstance just get pregnant because your doctor tells you it will cure you or relieve you of your endo symptoms. There are a lot of great reasons to get pregnant but treating your Endometriosis really shouldn’t be one.

If you are suffering or suspect you may have Endometriosis and want more information on diagnosis and treatments head over to Flourishing With Endo.

I’d love to hear from you! Comment your stories of Endometriosis and pregnancy to help get the word out there!